Last weekend was my initiation, and I couldnt have asked for more. I had a seasoned Shaman and a HPS from two other paths there…wow Crone energy! And I felt it, I felt that knowledge come pouring into me…almost taking my breath away. It was in between Lughnasadh and the full moon in Leo, with Neptune going retrograde. I am totally feeling things shift, with Mercury going in retrograde I am really feeling this going inward energy. It has been an emotional time, as it feels like the veil is being ripped from my eyes, not just one layer at a time. I feel raw today. Changes are not always simple, nor easy. What’s worse is that people that are not in tune with your path do not understand. I feel like I am getting my balance on a new plane of energy….and I am.
This is an emotional time, it is one of letting the old parts of me die giving way to the new parts. I see and feel things changing around me, including my relationships with others. I am even changing physically as well, and attitude! I will no longer allow others to bust through the boundaries I set. I am taking on the role of a Priestess of the Great Mother, and that is one path you dont take lightly. I see these people reading books, then deciding that they too are already a Priestess. You may be a Priestess in training, but it take many years to truly become. I have been on my path now for 17 yrs, more really but I am speaking of actively seeking. You see it takes a while to release all the nonsense society has had you to believe, the lies that some religions like to tell you. You have to see beyond, do your research, and learn. Many would not be walking a path they are walking if they only knew the actual truth behind it….but then again maybe they would because not all are strong enough to break down the facade.
Have I thought about throwing in the towel? YES, and more than once. But you see, the Goddess will still come to you, she will be in your heart and soul. When you are called by the Goddess, the pull is so great that turning back is really out of the question. But you do have to understand, that I have been on a Pagan path for many years. I have experienced other paths, dipped my toes in the waters many times, until it was the time when I could dedicate myself to this. And it is a dedication, as the Goddess works on you night and day. I havent done some amazing feat to some, but to me I have. I have listened to my Soul and the Great Goddess. I have sacrificed and put her first, and the transformation has been remarkable. I wouldnt suggest this path for all, getting the year and a day sure……but the path of the Priestess is very tiring and is 24/7.
Many come, but few actually make it!